Growing up as an Arab woman is not less than an honor for me. I do love the fact that I am an Arab. Yet we all know that even it is 2019, we are still living in a male dominant society. We live in a society where we are made a target of some useless things.
Growing us as an Arab, I have heard these 8 things all over: I am sure other Arab women would readily agree with this as it is quite relatable! These things are irritating and the reason for writing the very article is to let people know that it is time to stop telling us these!
When are you getting married?
We tend to hear this question on almost every gathering and occasion. As soon as we get off the so-called marriage liable age, the family and relatives are worried about the marriage. And the phrase that is tossed to us is that: when will you make us happy?”
Why associate happiness with marriage only. Why don’t people get happy with the educational success of women and so?
Make your private matters public
if you are an Arab woman, you are not expected to have private things private. You are expected to make them public. The family would ask the private questions in public as though it doesn’t matter.
Why is a woman expected to answer questions like why do you chose to have/not to have a veil, how many kids are you planning and so?
Your weight is our matter
The Arab aunties have taken up the role of weight police. Even before greeting you, they will comment about your weight and will give you free weight loss/gain devices.
What will people say?
By teenage, we are used to hearing what will people say. Our parents would reject our choices and our decisions because of the fear of society. This is highly unjust, and it needs to stop. We need to learn that dreams are more important than society.
Do it after marriage
When girls get of age, whatever they want to do is banned with a label that you can do it after marriage. I remember that when I asked my mum if I could dye my hair, she told me yeah but after your marriage. Oh wow, I never knew a marriage certificate was required for dying hair!
Men don’t like that way
When we get closer to the so-called age of marriage we are taught to do things the way Arab men like. We are asked to speak politely because men like that way, we are asked to maintain shyness because men like that way!
We are giving you a favor… we are not allowing you to work!
Saudi men still believe that women are not capable of working as they are weak, and home is the best place for them. So, when a woman would ask a man (be it father, brother or husband) if she could work, men would laugh and say, no, you don’t need to. Stay at home and enjoy.
Associating women with honor
So, women are the one who is associated with the honor of the family, her little move can cause dishonor to the family!
*boy messes up*
Family: this how boys are…
*Girls messes up*
family: Our name! Our honor!
you are lowering your worth..
who will marry you??
— ℳahnoor (@red__Cat_says) February 12, 2018